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Dont be frightened! When a Bennington student, 10 minutes before you come up to the podium hands you a mace, that he made,

If you dont bring it to the podium with you, you will never be Bennington.

So I would like to thank you Ben for helping me put the fear of God in the audience tonight. But I have to put it down because Im an actor, and I am really weak. That was heavy! It wasnt like a prop. That shit was real!

Thanks Ben.

So now Im going to read. And Im not off book. So I might be looking down a lot.

Thank you, President Coleman, Brian Conover, faculty, students, family, alumni, some of whom are dear friends of mine who have travelled all the way from the big city to see me hopefully not humiliate myself tonight.

And especially thanks to you, the Graduating Class of 2021.

See, as a joke I wrote, hold for applause, and I was actually going to read that. So you kind of killed my joke!